Commentators have warned a woman not to send her boyfriend money after he asked her to borrow $5,000 after her child, whom she has never met, was injured.
The original poster (OP), known as u/Throwra4977575, posted about the situation to Reddit’s popular “Am I The A**hole” forum where it received over 6,000 upvotes and 2,600 comments. The position can be found here.
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In the post titled “AITA for refusing to pay for my boyfriend’s son’s surgery?” the 32-year-old explained that she had met her 36-year-old boyfriend three months earlier at the airport.
Her boyfriend is single and has sons aged 6 and 12 whom she has not yet met, although he has shown her pictures.
“He says it’s early for his kids to meet me. It’s for their sanity and I respect that,” the post read. “I send them (kinda expensive) gifts every weekend and my boyfriend has assured me he’ll tell them where those gifts come from eventually.”
The OP said her boyfriend did not speak to her for an entire week before informing her that her son was in hospital. She said she felt bad and offered to visit, but her boyfriend said it was “not necessary” and “suggested” that she send gifts to cheer him up instead.
“He called me later to tell me he was busy all day trying to find the money to pay for his son’s surgery,” the message read. “We talked about it and then he asked me if I could lend him $5,000 to help pay for the surgery.”
The OP said she was ‘taken aback’ and her boyfriend said he felt ‘heavy’ asking her but there was no one else ‘willing to help’.
She explained that she didn’t feel comfortable giving him $5,000 up front because she was working hard to save her money.
“He said it was okay if I didn’t feel comfortable,” the post read. “But then he started talking about it saying he was in desperate need of help and the operation was due to take place next week on the doctor’s recommendation.”
The OP said she felt pressured but her boyfriend “promised” she could meet his children after the operation.
“I finally refused and he got mad at me and kept saying how cruel I was and how little I cared about his kids and him,” the post read. “But I swore it wasn’t like that but he hung up on me saying he needed some fresh air.”
Afterwards, he sent the OP an image of a child’s arm with an IV drip attached, claiming it was his son. She said she cried and called him when she saw him but received no response.
“I’m still refusing to pay but a friend of mine says I should and have some kind of contract in place to make sure I get the money back,” the post read. “AITA for not wanting to pay?”
In an update, the PO said she was considering making a surprise visit to the hospital to see if her boyfriend’s story was true.
More than 2,600 users commented on the post, with many warning the woman not to send money in case she was scammed.